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It’s not clear what Ralph Polnicky bought from the Tractor Supply store in Shawnee, Okla., but it was probably cleaner than the freebie he says he received after confronting an employee about how long his order was taking. Polnicky says he received a package containing a replica... package. The “replica of the male anatomy” is how the local TV station put it, and the junk mail had “Don’t come back” written down the length of the sculpted shaft. It’s the same thing Polnicky says a Tractor Supply employee shouted at him. While the plastic protuberance was presumably produced for a woman’s pleasure, Polnicky’s partner apparently panicked at the improper present: “My wife’s been terrified,” Polnicky said. Tractor Supply headquarters says it investigated and found no evidence an employee was responsible. (AC/KFOR Oklahoma City) ...But a lower-level employee told him how he could get satisfaction nevertheless.
Original Publication Date: 12 May 2013
This story is in True’s book collections, in Volume 19.

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