Story Archive

Running Out of Time

Police were dispatched to a Casper, Wyo., residence, where they found Bryant Johnson with bloodshot eyes, slightly slurred speech, and the smell of alcohol on him. He told the officers he was from the year 2048, and had traveled back in time to warn locals of an alien invasion coming next year, and he needed to speak to the president of the town. He explained that in order to time travel, aliens filled his body with alcohol and had him stand on a giant pad. But he had ended up in the wrong year: he was transported to 2017 instead of 2018, which is when he’d intended to go. A blood sample showed he had a blood alcohol content of .136 percent, and Johnson was arrested on public intoxication charges. (MS/KTWO Casper) ...He already tried that excuse next time.