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Since 1994, this is the 1566th issue of Randy Cassingham’s...

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16 June 2024: Guardians of the GalaxyCopyright ©2024

Astle, at work.The Spark of an Idea: A video of a man at a Walmart in Belleville, Ill., went viral: “This man is really just stealing everything,” said the woman making thevideo. “So open about it, look at the screen, ain’t nothing ringing up.” It’s posted on TikTok, Instagram, and YouTube; the repost on, by “Crime Net” (“Crime Caught On Camera”) has well over 15 million views. And Bill Astle isn’t happy about everyone calling him a thief in the comments: he works for Walmart, and was doing delivery that day. Walmart’s “Spark” delivery drivers use a phone app to scan everything, and only swing into the self-scan area to bag the items. “Everything is done offthe phone, so when we get to the register, we’re not actually scanning a single item,” he said. “I’m not a thief.” He wants the videos pulled off the Internet. He adds that the video ended before he did scan two dozen roses — for his wife. He has the receipt to prove he paid for those himself. (RC/KMOV St. Louis) ...Always keep your receipts.

Back Seat Driver: Around 2:00 a.m., San Diego, Calif., police officer Anthony Hair called a fellow officer. “He ... asked if I had my patrol car key with me,” that officer told investigators. “I asked him why he needed me, and he said he would tell me when I got there. He said he was really embarrassed.” Hair finally admitted he was locked in the back of his patrol car, and later told investigators he was checking on the woman he was taking to jail and the door closed behind him — andhis body camera had been “accidentally bumped” and turned off just before that. An internal investigation reached some different conclusions: while the body camera was on, Hair and the woman talked. “You’re not too bad,” the woman told him. “What’s it gonna hurt me if I work the system, you know what I mean?” She then made an explicit, illicit proposal. A few minutes later, Hair’s body camera was off, GPS showed the patrol car pulling into an alley and stopping, and about 20 minutes later Hairwas calling for a key to get him out of the back seat. Hair has resigned. (MS/KFMB San Diego) ...If someone is working the system, and you’re the system, it’s going to hurt.

Zero Tolerance in California doesn’t apply to teachers. Stuff goes down in Florida. An oops in China. A really crappy museum in Arizona. A too-secure jail(!?) in Texas. A predictable earthquake in Scotland. A bear of a problem in California. And the coolest animal story you could have heard all week. You missed all of those. Really, just try Premium: sign up for the quarterly auto-renewal, read it for a few weeks, and if you don’t like it, cancel it before it renews again. Butyou will almost certainly want to keep it going. It’s hard to describe what you miss, so try it! Plus, this publication is almost entirely supported by Premium upgrades, and we really need more support to pay the bills. It’s a great win-win. Thanks!

“I tell people reading This is True makes my life seem normal!” —Premium reader Jock in New Jersey

Welcome to the Modern World: The Marubo, a remote tribe in Brazil’s Javari Valley Indigenous Territory, are a little less remote than they used to be. One of their leaders, Enoque Marubo, sought help bringing Starlink Internet to their village; his video reached a philanthropist in Oklahoma, and now the Marubo are online. “It changed the routine so much that it was detrimental,” Enoque said. “In the village, if you don’t hunt, fish and plant, you don’t eat.” So now the Marubo, who areall named Marubo, are only online during certain hours. TamaSay Marubo complains that, while “some young people maintain our traditions,” some “just want to spend the whole afternoon on their phones.” TamaSay is in an excellent position to complain about people not sticking to tradition, because she is a tribal leader, which no other woman previously was. Instead of making traditional dyes, Tsainama Marubo said, young Marubo are “learning the ways of the white people.” After a moment, the73-year-old also said, “But please don’t take our Internet away.” (AC/New York Times) ...Complaining about young people being online while wanting to be online yourself — that also sounds like plenty of white people.

Fire Dept. photo.Undercarriage Wash is Extra: A two-car crash in Lake Forest, Calif., resulted in injuries requiring “paramedic level care,” said the Orange County FireAuthority. What firefighters couldn’t explain was how it happened, just that a fire hydrant had been sheared off, and one of the cars’ rear end was left levitating “7-8 feet” in the air due to the huge jet of water spraying straight up. “We’re going to chalk this up as something you don’t see every day,” a spokesman said. (RC/KTLA Los Angeles) ...Don’t just stand there scratching your head, scour nearby homes and businesses for security camera video!

Just Go the Hell Outside!
Summer Is Near. Here’s How to Get Started on an Outdoor Exercise Routine
AP headline

Did You Find an Error? Check the Errata Page for updates.

This Week’s Contributors: MS-Mike Straw, AC-Alexander Cohen, RC-Randy Cassingham.

An Extra Story that was cut from Premium as I built this free edition is on my blog. It’s a simple little story about a bank having to tell regulators of an ethical problem, and that triggered a bit of a rant on my part. It’s all in my blog: Wells Fargo, Trampled.

You Might Remember that I was too exhausted from being in the hospital to write an Honorary Unsubscribe for the 19 May issue. On May 21 I was skimming through Facebook and saw a post about a friend. I glanced at it and moved on, and then thought “Wait....” and scrolled back and expanded it to see if it said what I thought it was saying. It was: it was a tribute to her wonderful co-worker who had died.

I had met his wife once, and his son another time, but I don’t even have email addresses for them, so I wasn’t able to get any details. On Sunday I finally got the info I needed — it was enough for an Honorary Unsubscribe to fill that open slot. Meet Premium subscriber Al Boss, someone you will wish you had known; I had the opportunity to know him, and interact with him often.

As it happens, this week’s Honorary Unsubscribe is for someone I knew too. The archive page includes a scan of an award I received from the honoree.

By the Way: No one has asked about this, but my experiment of allowing comments on the H.U.s has ended. It was used infrequently, and I’d just as soon not take the disk space for the needed spam-filtering and comment subscription software.

Ten Years Ago in True: Wait — the Students Actually Read That?

The Fire Hydrant Item is the Story of the Week, which means you’re welcome to share it from Telegram, Mastodon, Instagram, and/or Facebook, or grab from any of those to post elsewhere.

This Week’s Sunday Reading: What does it feel like to save someone's life? Well, let me tell you a story. Honest to Goodness Good Stuff from 2009.

This Week’s Honorary Unsubscribe goes to Ed Stone. Ed is also goes to someone I knew. The story in about 4 minutes.

Basic Subscriptions to This is True are Free at All stories are completely rewritten using facts from the noted sources. This is True® (and Get Out of Hell Free® and Stella Awards®) are registered trademarks of ThisisTrue.Inc. Published weekly by ThisisTrue.Inc, PO Box 666, Ridgway CO 81432 USA (ISSN 1521-1932).

Copyright ©2024 by Randy Cassingham, All Rights Reserved. All broadcast, publication, retransmission to email lists, web site or social media posting, or any other copying or storage, in any medium, online or not, is strictly prohibited without prior written permission from the author. Manual forwarding by email to friends is allowed if 1) the text is forwarded in its entirety from the “Since 1994” line on top through the end of this paragraph and 2) No fee is charged. I request that you forward no more than three copies to any one person — after that, they should get their own free subscription. I appreciate people who report violations of my copyright.

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