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Since 1994, this is the 1661st issue of Randy Cassingham’s...
| 12 April 2026: Marvin the Martian | Copyright ©2026 https://thisistrue.com |
Escalation: Florida woman turns a speeding ticket into multiple felony counts. [Premium Only]
Escalation II: Man turns a shoplifting charge into multiple felony counts. [Premium Only]
Escalation III: Florida man turns a minor parking infraction to an almost-sure Miami decade (or more) in prison. [Premium Only]
Back to Ads: We need 5 upgrades per week to create enough financial support to omit ads. In the past week there have been 0 upgrades, 0 returning to Premium, and $20 in contributions. I can’t keep things going on $20/week. You don’t like ads, I don’t like ads, so maybe I just need to not send out newsletters when there’s no support? Then everyone gets nothing. Please don’t take this weekly dose of sanity for granted: upgrade here or contribute here to keep it all going. Please step up if you can, and thanks. And yes, for the record, ads start next week since I don’t have time to insert one now, unless there are just short of 10 upgrades (to account for the $20) by next week. Oh, and the only thing I like less than ads? Having to write this paragraph every week sincethere isn’t enough support. 🙁
Economics of Education: Mike’s funniest tagline of the week. [Premium Only]
Well, That’s Just Peachey: A Pennsylvania-based obliviot barely survived his own “entertainment” idea. [Premium Only]
Debate Station: When police got to an Irvine, Calif., gas station to which they had been called, they said they found their suspect waiting by a pump for a worker to let the fuel flow. He’d gone in and ordered $55 worth of gas, but hadn’t provided the $55. As the unnamed man explained to the officers, “I sincerely believe that money as a unit of payment is not real.” The cop replied, “You can believe that, dude,” but said he needed to either pay or leave. After a “standoff” theyarrested him, and said the consequences of his disobedience would be “very real.” Still, they gave him credit for a “bold move with these gas prices.” (AC/KTTV Los Angeles) ...If money isn’t real, he did in fact receive $55 worth of gas.
The Tipping Point: Americans are getting fed up with out-of-control tipping. [Premium Only]
The Cost of War: As the ceasefire in Iran started, the chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, Gen. Dan Caine, briefed reporters on some of the costs of Operation Epic Fury. “Along the way, we consumed more than 6 million meals, and by my estimate, more than 950,000 gallons of coffee, 2 million energy drinks, and a lot of nicotine,” he explained. “But I am not saying that we have a problem.” He expressed gratitude for the service members’ sacrifice. “This is gritty and unforgivingbusiness,” he said. “It’s chaotic, it’s hot, it’s dark, is unpredictable, and there’s always unknowns. And our people proudly walked into those unknowns and continue forward, and through it all, the joint force has demonstrated the unwavering resolve that the nation demands of us.” (MS/CBS) ...Caffeine and nicotine: fueling America’s fighting forces since 1776.
Content with Condiments: City’s bureaucratic regulation may end up in the U.S. Supreme Court for review. [Premium Only]
The Smell of Fear: The Bellingham (Wash.) Fire Dept. responded to a reported “chemical odor” at an apartment complex. Firefighters confirmed the report and issued a “shelter in place” order for residents as they investigated; two firefighters were sent to a hospital as a precaution when they became affected by the odor. More units were called in, including a Hazmat team. BFD Captain Dustin Michaelis says the problem was finally traced to “a tenant experiencing a behavioral healthissue” who was “likely spraying [bear repellant] on the fourth floor for some hours.” (RC/Bellingham Now) ...75 percent of the stories in This is True could be categorized as “a behavioral health issue.”
Peak Performance: Man breaks a record for a sweet reason. [Premium Only]
There’s Supposed to Be an Earth-Shattering Kaboom! The launch of Artemis II was a great opportunity for seismologyresearchers at the University of South Florida. It’s not just that they wanted to measure ground movement from the launch: they installed dozens of instruments to record the powerful soundwaves coming from the launch. “I mean, there’s been nothing bigger than this,” said study leader Glenn Thompson. “It’s the most powerful rocket launch from Kennedy Space Center since Saturn V” Apollo launch vehicle, he says, and probably more powerful than that rocket. “Every time that there’s a newsworthylaunch, we make an extra effort to record it.” Rocket launches are handy because their launch dates and times are known, which makes their sounds easier to capture than what the team usually uses to get super-loud noises: volcanic eruptions. Their next opportunity will be a SpaceX Starship launch, when they plan to install 75 monitoring instruments. (RC/WOFL Orlando) ...Which, if that launch is scrubbed, will still be able to record the subsequent eruption from Elon Musk.
Carrying Forward: Small town in Japan gets creative with an ancient ritual. [Premium Only]
Gamesmanship: When private business dictates how a city and county spends a billion dollars of taxpayer money. [Premium Only]
That’s One Way to Make Him Hot
Florida Woman Trying to Rekindle Marriage Accused of Torching Husband’s Home
WOFL Orlando healine
Did You Find an Error? Check the Errata Page for updates.
This Week’s Contributors: MS-Mike Straw, AC-Alexander Cohen, RC-Randy Cassingham.
Stories This Week were Written/Edited in Bali, Indonesia.
I Was an Early-In Responder to an incident near our house where a woman heard someone outside and sheltered in a bathroom with the kids. She took bear spray with her for protection, and managed to set it off in that confined space (ref. “The Smell of Fear” story).
Once the cops arrived (to have a good margin of safety), we asked her to hand the kids out to get them into fresh air. Just standing outside in front of the open front door was pretty intense; can’t imagine what it was like in that bathroom!
We found no evidence of a prowler having been outside. The kids were doing remarkably well. The toddler glommed on to me like I was his best friend as I carried him to fresher air. No one needed to go to the hospital.
This Section Originally Started with “I’m Considering Making a Change to the Honorary Unsubscribe. (Don’t worry, you’ll like it!)”
Then it got a bit long, so I moved it to my blog: Reviving the Honorary Unsubscribe Archive. If you are a fan of the H.U., you will want to read the post. (If you aren’t a fan of the H.U., you should give it another chance!)
Ten Years Ago in True: Anything You Whisper Can and Will Be Used Against You in a Court of Law.
I Love Coincidences: This week’s stories include one slugged, “There’s Supposed to Be an Earth-Shattering Kaboom!” Hours after writing that, I went to look at the Archive to find the Ten Years Ago story. One of those stories, by Mike, is slugged “Where’s the Earth-Shattering Kaboom?” (here).
This Week’s Story of the Week (you’re welcome to share it), about the obliviot demanding $55 worth of gas, is shareable via Telegram, Mastodon, Instagram, Threads, Bluesky, and/or Facebook, or grab from any of those to post elsewhere.
This Week’s Sunday Reading: Praying for cellvation? Or, do we really need the Lord’s Prayer ‘translated’ to SMS-speak? A True story from 2001. Isn’t Life Already Short Enough?
This Week’s Honorary Unsubscribe goes to Jim Whittaker. The first full-time employee of the now-famous REI Co-Op, Whittaker also became the first American to do something that brought him great fame. The story in about 3 minutes.
- The Very First H.U. from the archives: Jack Lord from 18 January 1998.
- Honorary Unsubscribe Archive.
Basic Subscriptions to This is True are Free at https://thisistrue.com. All stories are completely rewritten using facts from the noted sources. This is True® (and Get Out of Hell Free® and Stella Awards®) are registered trademarks of ThisisTrue.Inc. Published weekly by ThisisTrue.Inc, PO Box 666, Ridgway CO 81432 USA (ISSN 1521-1932).
Copyright ©2026 by Randy Cassingham, All Rights Reserved. All broadcast, publication, retransmission to email lists, web site or social media posting, or any other copying or storage, in any medium, online or not, is strictly prohibited without prior written permission from the author. Manual forwarding by email to friends is allowed if 1) the text is forwarded in its entirety from the “Since 1994” line on top through the end of this paragraph and 2) No fee is charged. I request that you forward no more than three copies to any one person — after that, they should get their own free subscription. I appreciate people who report violations of my copyright.
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