Story Archive

That Gnawing Feeling

A Tallmadge, Ohio, police officer saw a suspicious vehicle near an apartment complex. He ran the plates, found the owner had a suspended license, and then approached the car and asked the occupants to identify themselves. One man gave two different false identities. “So they tell the guy they’re going to check his fingerprints with a mobile device,” Police Chief Ron Williams said. “And the guy responded by actually chewing his fingertips so he couldn’t be identified.” The officers were unfazed, and were still able to positively identify Kirk Kelly, 24, who was wanted in Tampa, Fla., on multiple felony charges, thanks to multiple distinctive tattoos on his chest. (MS/Akron Beacon Journal) ...They just didn’t give him enough time to keep chewing.