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Trust Us, We’re Experts

With recreational marijuana set to become legal in Ontario, Canada, the York Catholic school board brought high school students to the headquarters of the York Regional Police so they could ask questions of the “experts” on drugs. Apparently not having any better arguments, “drug recognition officer” Nigel Cole told the boys that marijuana promoted gynecomastia — breast growth in males. Or “Doobies make boobies,” as he put it to the kids, additionally claiming, “We’re finding 60 percent of 14-year-olds are developing ‘boobies’.” Cole also claimed that half a joint “is equivalent to seven alcoholic beverages” and “any average person that has seven drinks is legally intoxicated.” Once a transcript of the talk was published in a newspaper, an uproar ensued, and the department backpedaled furiously on social media. “We’re no health experts, but we’re pretty sure getting high does not cause enhanced mammary growth in men,” a better-informed spokesman tweeted. A Toronto doctor commented that he didn’t know where the officer is “pulling these numbers from.” (RC/Toronto Star) ...Especially if he was sitting down.