Story Archive

Cock of the Road

Daniel H. Jones “was adamant about trying to hit the rooster,” said Vincent Vurro of Key West, Fla. Jones, who had come to the Keys from New Jersey, was driving a golf cart. He tried to hit the bird, but he flipped the cart. It rolled, ejecting him and two passengers, with minor injuries. Police said Jones stuck his fingers and his shirt in his mouth, but they managed to test his blood-alcohol level, which turned out to be thrice the legal limit. No word on the bird’s alcohol consumption; he escaped unharmed. (AC/Florida Keys News) ...If you’re going to drink, be sure to put your car(t) keys where you can’t find them.