Story Archive

70 is the New 50

Although he was born on 11 March 1949, “My biological age is 45 years,” claims Emile Ratelband after a checkup from his doctor. Ratelband, from Arnhem, Netherlands, reasons that “Transgenders can now have their gender changed on their birth certificate,” therefore “there should be room for an age change.” He has filed in court to have his birth certificate amended to show his birth date as 11 March 1969; the judge is dubious, and will rule later. Why the petition? “When I’m 69, I am limited. If I’m 49, then I can buy a new house, drive a different car.” But perhaps the real reason is women don’t click on his Tinder dating profile thanks to his stated age, but if he can list his age as 49, “with the face I have, I will be in a luxurious position.” (RC/London Telegraph) ...Wait: he didn’t already lie about his age on his Tinder profile?!