Story Archive

No Parking

A police officer in Palm Beach, Fla., saw a blue Ferrari parked on a dock on the Palm Beach Inlet, and told the driver he couldn’t park there. The officer watched as James Mucciaccio Jr., 48, backed his car up — and then suddenly accelerate toward the dock again “at a high rate of speed.” The car and driver shot off the end of the pier into the ocean. He got out of the floating car and was picked up by a passing boat, and came back to the police officer to talk with him. “Jesus made me the smartest man on Earth,” Mucciaccio claimed, “and it’s so hard to have this much responsibility.” Fire Rescue crews said there was no evidence that Mucciaccio was under the influence of alcohol or drugs. Divers used air cushions to refloat the car and bring it ashore with about $50,000 of damage. “Money is going to be irrelevant in two days,” he told the officer, so “remember to smile.” (RC/WPLG Miami, Palm Beach Post) ...That was two weeks ago: so much for that theory.