Story Archive

Dell Hell

Lucas Hinch, 37, of Colorado Springs, Colo., says even though he got a citation from police, it was worth it. “It was glorious,” he said. “Angels sung on high.” He had been fed up “for the last several months” with his balky Dell desktop computer and, well, he had just gotten a new gun — a 9 mm pistol. No hothead, Hinch took the computer into the alley behind his home, made sure that there was nothing beyond his computer that could be hurt, and then let loose with eight rounds. Thus, “It was premeditated, oh, definitely,” Hinch said. Police tweeted that Hinch had “executed” the machine; he was cited for discharging a weapon within city limits. “The computer,” the local newspaper concluded, “is not expected to recover.” (RC/Colorado Springs Gazette, Los Angeles Times) ...The 9 mm: when Ctrl-Alt-Del just isn’t enough anymore.