The Comments I Get to include in the newsletters are often so hilarious, they sometimes beat out the stories in entertainment value. This week that obliviot would be Joe in Birmingham, England:
“This site steals all its story’s [sic] from the main stream [sic] media!” he posted. “He just rewrites other peoples [sic] work and has the cheek to charge people for it.”
Why that’s just shocking! A news commentary site that summarizes and comments on “legitimate, mainstream news” actually …uh… does just that? What a legitimate complaint …from someone who didn’t pay a cent. But indeed thousands happily pay to get more of it every week. If they didn’t get value, they wouldn’t pay, would they, Joe?
Not to mention there are thousands of stories on the site that he can read for free. There’s no paywall whatever. Hell, there aren’t even ads!
But That’s Not Even the Hilarious Part
The best part is that Joe signed his comment with the name “Judgement,” and his location as “earth” (and, of course, used a fake email address), because he doesn’t have the cojones to put his real name on his opinions, like I do.
Yet… if he didn’t sign his name, how do I know it? Because three minutes before he made that comment on the announcement in my blog that I was returning the True Stella Awards cases back to the Stella web site (I removed them years ago), he had left another comment with his real name, location, and email address. Slap … his … forehead!
Joe’s first comment was on the same page, to recite the “true facts” of the original lawsuit filed by Stella Liebeck. The problem: he not only got several of the “facts” wrong, I already covered Stella’s case in detail on the site years and years ago, with all the facts (from both sides of the argument; he conveniently neglected to note there were two sides in the case).
I can hear it now: “Wait… you didn’t publish my comment?! I’m gonna sue you!”
His second comment ended with a threat of a criminal nature, which (if I thought he had any actual ability to carry out) would definitely arouse the interest of the FBI if he was in the U.S., and maybe even though he’s not. The best part? I’d be able to give investigators his surname, too, since it’s part of his email address. D’oh!
Then It Gets Obliviotic
The biggest eye-roller of this whole thing is that Joe didn’t stop to think that of course web sites log every visit, recording the I.P. address of the visitor, so it’s extremely easy to put the two comments together even if they weren’t just 3 minutes apart.
Seems Joe gets his Internet connection from EE Limited, part of British Telecom. Big companies don’t think too kindly of customers using their facilities to make criminal threats. If the FBI didn’t care (or are too overworked to deal with a flea like Joe), I’ll bet British Telecom would immediately yank his access for violation of their terms of service, which no doubt prohibits criminal activity.
But then, “not thinking” is almost certainly Joe’s life-long M.O. He’s the type that blames others for their own shortcomings. They “think” it’s someone else’s fault they don’t have a job (or have a lousy one). They “think” it’s someone else’s fault that they didn’t finish school. And they definitely “think” it’s someone else’s fault that they don’t have a girlfriend — surely it has nothing whatever to do with having to live in his parent’s basement.
So as it usual comes down to the same thing that’s behind most of the This is True stories in general: they didn’t think.
And that’s what makes this not just a comedy, but a comedic tragedy.
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