There were two wonderful stories in this week’s issue that really go nicely together. And one has a photo that has to be seen to be believed. Let’s start with the stories, from True’s 15 January 2012 issue:
Tempest in a C Cup
Police in Mesa, Ariz., pulled over a car at 2:00 a.m. during a search for a suspect wanted for weapons violations. When an officer asked the people in the car if they had any weapons, Angela Lynn Milhoan, 20, admitted she had a .22-caliber semi-automatic pistol in her right bra cup. She was arrested: it’s not only illegal for someone under 21 to carry a concealed weapon, but police say Milhoan is a felon, and is therefore prohibited from possessing weapons. (RC/Arizona Republic) …The magazine full of ammo? Leftit, naturally.
A lot of guys are hoping for a mug shot of Miss Milhoan, but that’s not what I have for you today. Read on. Right on the heels of that story is this one:
Rectum, Hell — It Damn Near Killed ’Im!
A North Carolina state trooper spotted a man wanted in Georgia on a murder charge. When the trooper and a backup unit got the man pulled over, the suspect rolled up his windows and locked his door; the troopers forced the door open and had to subdue Michael Ward with a Taser. Ward allegedly gave a false name during his booking, and was strip-searched, and no contraband was found. When Ward complained of heart problems and said he couldn’t walk, he was taken to a hospital. He was released back to custody after a checkup. Through all of this, no one found the full-sized .38-caliber revolver that Ward had hidden “in a body cavity,” as WECT-TV delicately put it. The gun was discovered the next day during a cell check; Ward was returned to the hospital for another checkup to ensure the gun didn’t do any damage. The gun, investigators say, was not loaded, but was “in operational condition.” (RC/WECT Wilmington) …The six empty tubes of KY Jelly in his car should have been a clue.
Now, a mug shot might be interesting, but really it’s rather humdrum:
No, it’s this photo that will make a lot of people gasp (or at least wince!):
Six tubes of lube just wouldn’t be enough for mortal men!
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