There were two wonderful stories in this week’s issue that really go nicely together. And one has a photo that has to be seen to be believed. Let’s start with the stories, from True’s 15 January 2012 issue:
Tempest in a C Cup
Police in Mesa, Ariz., pulled over a car at 2:00 a.m. during a search for a suspect wanted for weapons violations. When an officer asked the people in the car if they had any weapons, Angela Lynn Milhoan, 20, admitted she had a .22-caliber semi-automatic pistol in her right bra cup. She was arrested: it’s not only illegal for someone under 21 to carry a concealed weapon, but police say Milhoan is a felon, and is therefore prohibited from possessing weapons. (RC/Arizona Republic) …The magazine full of ammo? Leftit, naturally.
A lot of guys are hoping for a mug shot of Miss Milhoan, but that’s not what I have for you today. Read on. Right on the heels of that story is this one:
Rectum, Hell — It Damn Near Killed ’Im!
A North Carolina state trooper spotted a man wanted in Georgia on a murder charge. When the trooper and a backup unit got the man pulled over, the suspect rolled up his windows and locked his door; the troopers forced the door open and had to subdue Michael Ward with a Taser. Ward allegedly gave a false name during his booking, and was strip-searched, and no contraband was found. When Ward complained of heart problems and said he couldn’t walk, he was taken to a hospital. He was released back to custody after a checkup. Through all of this, no one found the full-sized .38-caliber revolver that Ward had hidden “in a body cavity,” as WECT-TV delicately put it. The gun was discovered the next day during a cell check; Ward was returned to the hospital for another checkup to ensure the gun didn’t do any damage. The gun, investigators say, was not loaded, but was “in operational condition.” (RC/WECT Wilmington) …The six empty tubes of KY Jelly in his car should have been a clue.
Now, a mug shot might be interesting, but really it’s rather humdrum:
No, it’s this photo that will make a lot of people gasp (or at least wince!):
Six tubes of lube just wouldn’t be enough for mortal men!
- - -
This page is an example of This is True’s style of “Thought-Provoking Entertainment”. True is an email newsletter that uses “weird news” as a vehicle to explore the human condition in entertaining way. If that sounds good, click here to open a subscribe form.
To really support True, please sign up for a paid subscription to the much-expanded “Premium” edition:
Q: Why would I want to pay more than the regular rate?
A: To support the publication to help it thrive and stay online: this kind of support means less future need for price increases (and smaller increases when they do happen), which enables more people to upgrade. This option was requested by existing Premium subscribers.