Sometimes the photo that goes with a story is funnier than the story. Sometimes the story is pretty good all by itself. This one, from the 19 October 2008 issue, is a toss-up: I’m not sure which part is funnier. First, the story:
Police in Middletown, Ohio, responded to a disturbance and found Michelle Allen, 32, running around the street wearing a cow suit. They advised her to go home. Instead, she impeded traffic, chased children, and urinated on a resident’s porch, so officers felt they had no choice but to arrest her. Allen, who police say smelled of alcohol, was given a month in jail for disorderly conduct. (Oxford Press) …A cow suit? Funny, but she was acting more like a horse’s ass.
Wait! Don’t scroll down yet!
Put down your milk (or coffee) before scrolling to view the two photos (but go slow enough that you see one at a time. Trust me: it’s worth it. Really.
Here’s her mug shot, courtesy of the Middletown Police:
But Wait, There’s More
Police mug shot cameras are generally set up to get an arrestee’s face, but there was more to this case than that:
And Still More!
History repeated itself almost exactly 10 years later, this time in Arkansas (and with a different variation in the suit). From True’s 28 October 2018 issue:
As a police officer in Pine Bluff, Ark., was searching Ashley Curry, 27, after she allegedly shoplifted nose spray at a Walmart store, she “stuck out her stomach area and told me I could ‘suck a pink cow udder’,” the officer noted in his report. Uh, is that a threat? A bribe? Unclear, but it was apparently related to what she was wearing: a black-and-white cow costume. Yes, it had udders, and yes, the officer took an evidence photo. Curry was taken to jail “and given a new black-and-white outfit, this one with stripes.” She was released after posting $1,520 bail. (RC/KATV Little Rock) …It was not reported whether she left wearing stripes or spots.
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