Language – This is True

Class Clown

Posted November 21, 2021October 11, 2021 in Education, Language10 Comments

I was intrigued by this week’s Headline — each week’s stories end with one, usually with some sort of twist, from a real news source:

Language Arts

Posted August 8, 2021August 8, 2021 in Away From Work, Education, Kids/Teens, Language6 Comments

This is an absolutely true story: I was in the class.

Peckertrace: Little Boys Will Be Little Boys

Posted April 3, 2021March 29, 2021 in Language, Technology11 Comments

Yet Another Case of a Certain Kind of Story (which I usually ignore, rather than feature in True) has led to a new This is True word:

peckertrace (pĕk′ər trās)
n.: an image created by a little boy man who thinks making a giant outline of a phallus is some sort of proof of manhood — a “mine is so huge that…” boast that actually reveals his fear of “mine is so tiny that…”.

“Let the Public Decide”? Bad Idea….

Posted January 29, 2021June 23, 2019 in Editorial, Explainer, Language, Online Life, Publicity Stunt20 Comments

Be careful what you ask for, since when an organization asks the public for input on what they should name something, they’re opening a Pandora’s box.

Masterfully Baited

Posted January 27, 2021May 13, 2019 in Language, Reader Feedback53 Comments

Two Stories from Last Week brought complaints that True is politically partisan. The hilarious aspect to the two stories: neither had anything to do with politics, but the readers are so sensitive they thought they were political slams. There were a number of protest unsubscribes, including a Premium reader, which is very unusual.

Pho Keene Controversy

Posted July 1, 2021January 7, 2019 in Bureaucracy, Editorial, Explainer, Government, Language, Publicity Stunt, Racism37 Comments

Update: The Restaurant Pho Keene Won!

Sometimes, I’ll Look at the Comments on a news site’s story that I use as a source for a True story. Not very often, since most news comments are a vast wasteland, but the comments on one of the Pho Keene stories I read caught my eye. The top comment was, “Who knew that Keene lacked a sense of humor?” And there was one response: “Anyone that lives here.” Let’s start with the story, from True’s first issue of 2019:

Dust Storms May Exist

Posted December 4, 2018March 19, 2018 in Bureaucracy, Government, Language, Trivia64 Comments

While Driving Across southern New Mexico this morning, I rolled my eyes a bit at a warning sign: “Dust Storms May Exist”. Well yeah, so might space aliens bent on beaming someone up from the desert. Reminds me of the one I see farther north: “Icy Conditions May Exist”. Are lawyers writing road signs now? Maybe charging by the letter?

Sorry, Ma’am

Posted November 30, 2021November 7, 2017 in Language, Reader Feedback25 Comments

Two readers (so far) don’t “get” a tagline from this week’s issue, so I thought I would explain the joke — even though I do understand “Explaining the joke makes it not funny.” Well, they don’t think it’s funny anyway, so let’s get to it. First, the story, from the 5 November 2017 issue:

Man Bites Weiner (or Vice Versa)

Posted December 16, 2021November 2, 2015 in Animals, Explainer, Guns, Language6 Comments

Very Often, Readers Submit Stories that are most definitely, without a doubt, weird. But sometimes I still can’t use them because despite being weird (one definition: unusual), they’re …well… not unusual.

A Pride of Obliviots

Posted January 28, 2021May 18, 2015 in Language, Obliviots/Idiots, Reader Feedback169 Comments

MSgt USAF (retired) Joe Ohio inquires, “As a multi-decade reader I find readers’ comments almost as entertaining as the stories. This brings me to my question. Being an English major I would like to know what the collective is for ‘obliviot’?”

The Euphemism Treadmill

Posted February 18, 2021June 21, 2011 in Editorial, Explainer, Language, Rant101 Comments

I ran a story in this week’s issue in part to provoke. Before my editorializing here’s the story, from the 19 June 2011 issue:

There’s No Such Thing as Writer’s Block

Posted January 28, 2021May 23, 2011 in Away From Work, Explainer, Giving Back, Language, Rant20 Comments

A friend of mine asked me for some advice last week. He’s preparing to leave the military, and thought writing might be his next career. Did I have any pearls of wisdom?

I gave him two main pieces of advice. The second one: he must understand that there’s no such thing as “writer’s block.”

Family Feud

Posted June 22, 2021September 6, 2010 in Crime, Death, Language, Photo31 Comments

Sometimes there’s a story that I “have” to publish, even though I know it just won’t make it past the spam filters, so I “can’t” put it in the email newsletter. And see below for an update.

Noblesse Oblige

Posted December 2, 2020October 19, 2009 in Language, Reader Feedback, Update99 Comments

Or, Was I Offensive to Little Girls?

There was a phrase in the previous blog entry on the 6-year-old kid, where I imagined the school staff: “Run in circles! Pull out your hair! Scream like a little girl!”

Today Nancy in Illinois complained that was “sexist language.” She writes:

Herb Caen: Master of the Three Dots

Posted April 15, 2021May 18, 2009 in Away From Work, Editorial, Language, Trivia, True Business47 Comments

This story is what got me started on remembering Herb Caen — it’s from True’s 17 May 2009 issue:

Tardwit

Posted October 29, 2020March 22, 2009 in Language, Obliviots/Idiots, Photo, Trivia113 Comments

Important Update Below
—
Sundays are writing day around here: it’s the day I write This is True each week. This week, I had the usual line-up of stories about stupid people doing stupid things (or, as the case may be, smart people doing stupid things!) when I came across the story of Mark Rimkufski from the weirdest state in the union, which is of course Florida.